Angela and I had the most wonderful privilege of escaping to the wilderness for almost an entire weekend without the kids. We slept in, we didn’t wake up to kids crawling over us, we didn’t have to change any diapers, we didn’t have to prepare any meals, we didn’t get peed or puked on, we had naps…
It. Was. Glorious!
First, I should probably clarify that I’m not the kind of guy that likes to hand off the kids at any given time in order to take off and indulge in a hobby, or a sacred weekly activity with “the guys.”
I take my role as a Dad pretty seriously, and that means I work hard to show my family that I have their best interest in mind at all times. I’ve also discovered that a big part of that is loving my children’s Mother.
It’s important to remember that I’m a Husband first, and a Dad second. Both are hefty titles, but it’s imperative that I remember which comes first.
I vividly remember my own Dad coming home from work day after day, and the first thing he would do was track down my Mom. If she wasn’t near the door when he walked in, he would walk the whole house if he had to. His first embrace was always Mom.
It didn’t take long for my siblings and I to realize that Mom was first in Dad’s heart and mind, and once they had a few minutes together, it was our turn to tell Dad about our day. There was no neglect, it made me feel safe.
I’ve worked hard to model this in my own home as well, and although we don’t get “out” as often as we would like at times, we always work hard to make time for each other, and we work hard to show our kids that this time together is important.
I’m not saying I’m doing everything right, I have faults and weaknesses, just like the next guy. But I want to encourage you this week in your marriages to show your kids that your spouse comes first.
It can start with the smallest of things, dish her plate out first at meal-times, hold the door open for her, make some time each day for just the two of you to sit and talk (explain to your kids that you aren’t to be bothered because this is important.) Let your kids see you honouring each other with your time, energy, and attention. Our kids are watching our every move and their perspectives and opinions of marriage are being developed and formed as they watch us interact with each other.
(A scary thought at times.)
Be so encouraged in what you are doing, keep at it, work hard to build a good home for your wife and children. The family was God’s idea, let’s not forget that. 😉
Unless the Lord builds the house, They labor in vain who build it; (Psalms 127:1a NKJV)